September 27, 2008
ClubCaf?: 25 Years
Michael Wood READ TIME: 4 MIN.
Club Caf?'s back room was buzzing on the evening of Sept. 22, as about 25 people loaded up plates at the pasta buffet and sat chatting at tables throughout the room for the Poz Pasta Night, the kickoff event for Club Caf?'s 25th anniversary week.
But once the formal program began the mood quickly shifted from festive to somber as, one by one, men got up and recounted their decades-long struggles living with HIV and AIDS, fighting to maintain their own health and watching friends and lovers succumb to the disease. Club Caf? owner Frank Ribaudo said the dinner commemorated an earlier series of pasta dinners Club Caf? held for people living with AIDS in the mid-'80s. The dinner also featured entertainment from local drag superstar Lakia Mondale.
Ribaudo told the crowd that not long after Club Caf? opened one of his employees, Kevin George, who operated a tanning salon on the premises, began hosting private pasta dinner parties at his home for people living with AIDS. The gatherings soon outgrew his home, so George, who would eventually succumb to AIDS in the late '80s, asked Ribaudo to host the dinners at the club. Ribaudo agreed, but he said at the time Club Caf? had not yet expanded into the space that now makes up the club's back room. Ribaudo hadn't even knocked down the wall between the back room and the rest of Club Caf?, but he and George decided to improvise.
"We punched a hole in the sheetrock wall and just got a two-by-four and some wooden horses and threw a table cloth on it and started the Monday night dinner program," said Ribaudo,
He said the dinner gave people living with HIV/AIDS not only physical nourishment but a chance to connect with other people and escape the sense of isolation that many people living with the disease felt.
"It was [George's] way of making sure people had some nourishment on the table and could socialize and weren't alone with the disease," said Ribaudo.
Following Ribaudo's introduction Paul Keating, program manager for JRI Health's Peer Support Services program, invited people in the audience to take the mic and reflect on their own long-term struggles with HIV and AIDS. He said the goal of the evening was both to reflect on the history of the epidemic as well as to "honor surviving." JRI co-sponsored the evening with Club Caf?.
Joe Capone, a teacher for the deaf and hard of hearing, told attendees that he remembers coming to Club Caf? when it first opened in 1983. At the time he was a student at Boston University; one year later he was diagnosed with HIV. He said he somehow found the strength to keep going, earning a degree in deaf education and building a career even as many of his friends were dying around him.
"I don't know how I did it, but I just went along with life, even when some friends and boyfriends died. ... I was one of the fortunate few who made it through the early years without getting ill," said Capone.
His luck began to change a few years ago when the virus in his system began developing resistance to the medications he was taking. He became ill and retired from teaching. Things turned around recently when his doctor found a new medication that proved effective.
"I kind of came back to life," said Capone.
Another man, who identified himself as B.A., said he tested positive 26 years ago, at a time when AIDS was still known as Gay Related Immune Disease, or GRID. "Does anyone remember GRID?" he asked, eliciting knowing chuckles from audience members.
B.A. said after his diagnosis he spent two years trying to ignore the disease and avoiding doctor's appointments, until his declining health forced him to go back. When he returned to the doctor he had pneumocystis pneumonia as well as Kaposi's sarcoma on the side of his face. He said he is still surprised today to look in the mirror and see that the Kaposi's sarcoma is gone.
B.A. said when he was first diagnosed he had little hope or desire to live a long life.
"I'm grateful to be here. I'm 57, and I remember when I was diagnosed thinking, 'Thank God I'm never going to see 40,'" he said. But he said as he continued to survive each passing year his will to hang on grew stronger.
"It was a struggle getting here, and thank God we're here, and thank God we're all pulling together," said B.A.
Raymon Turner told the crowd that he was diagnosed while living in Key West with his husband. The two were together for 14 years before his husband passed away. Turner said he was thankful to live in Key West at the time, where the gay community provided a strong network of support to people living with HIV/AIDS. He urged the people in the room who have been diagnosed more recently to make sure that they keep doing the things that they enjoy in life. He said he is thankful he can continue working and staying physically active.
"I still dive. I still like to go out sailing. I still keep focused on doing the things that make me happy," said Turner.
Gail Beverly, who since the mid-'80s has done counseling and testing work at Fenway Community Health, urged those in the room to "think like a consumer" in dealing with their doctors, asking them questions and taking an active role in determining a course of treatment. She also urged those in attendance to carry that activist spirit from the doctor's office into the streets by doing activism in the vein of ACT UP.
"I miss ACT UP. I miss it very much. We needed it when it was there. ... We need it now," said Beverly.
Read more of our coverage of Club Cafe's 25th anniversary here
Michael Wood is a contributor and Editorial Assistant for EDGE Publications.